Complications

There's a song by a very handsome man (not as handsome as my man of course) Tim McGraw titled Live Like You Were Dying. In the song, a sick man in his early forties (similarities abound) explains what he did with what little time he has left. He climbed a mountain, went skydiving, rode a bull and even asked someone for forgiveness. My sick, early forties husband is on borrowed time and for the past two years, every once in a while mentions something that is on his "bucket list". Just like the song, when you get the news that your time is limited, you reassess your life and what's truly important. You think about the things you always wanted to do and revisit all the "one day" items you have stored in your mind. However, in all honesty, if a heart doesn't come (and, I fear, rather soon) that "one day" will slip away. It truly breaks my heart to not be able to give him all the moments he has dreamed and talked about for so long. Money, as with anyone, plays a huge part but so does our transplant listing. Trouper can't be more than 2 hours from the hospital thus our options are truly limited.
I titled this blog Complications because being on the transplant list is wonderful blessing but it's also very restricting and complicated. Chances are, if you are sick enough to be placed on the transplant list than your time on earth is probably very limited. Trouper reiterated this to me the other day when, after a disagreement, he said "Dara, my time on earth is drawing to a close and I don't want to spend my last days angry". Heartbreaking and another reminder that our future hinges on a transplant. So, we try and make the best out of our situation. Over Memorial Day, our family and a few friends will go to the lake for some fun in the sun. I would like to say we've planned a cruise, or a trip to Ireland (okay that's my wish, Troup's is Italy) or at the very least planning a huge family reunion on a beach. Nonetheless, we will be together for four carefree days near the water.
Being married to Trouper for almost 23 years and knowing him for 30 years, I can say that his ultimate wish is to be near his family and friends. Please take the time to visit, call, email, or text. Yes, I realize Atlanta probably isn't number one on your vacation destination wish list but when time runs out, you can't buy more. Another complication. I know life gets in the way and you forget to check in with him but, when he runs through your mind, let him know.

As always, thank you to all our friends and family who've traveled this journey with us, we wouldn't be here today if it wasn't for your prayers. And one last thing, how would you spend your time, if given the chance to live like you were dying?