Let's face it, most of us have experienced some type of discrimination in our lifetime. Racial, sexual orientation, gender based, and yes, even body type (I've been treated differently because I am overweight) discrimination is just normal life. Is it fair, no, should we bust our butts to change it, yes.
Throughout our transplant journey, I hadn't given a second thought about the sexual orientation of Trouper's eventual donor. I have thought about their family, friends, religion and even if they will be a happy go lucky person, just like my Trouper. Sometimes, late at night when I can't sleep, I wonder if the way they died will somehow "scar" their heart. Will that have an effect on my husband? Will their family want to know who we are, or ever want to share stories with us? But again, I have never thought about their sexual orientation, who they chose to sleep with, who they chose to share a life with, only if they have a loving, kind heart.
Back in August, when I flew home to meet my new nephew Jackson, I noticed a sign in the airport that said something like "the average wait for a heart transplant at Baylor Hospital is 9 days" which STUNNED me as we had already been waiting for several months. I wondered how, or why, they would be able to perform more transplants than our Atlanta hospital. Atlanta and Dallas are both major cities, the hospitals are both major hospitals but I went about my visit and forgot about the sign. Fast forward to two weeks ago, when Trouper's coordinator asked him to come see the doctor on a random Thursday. What he was told was shocking, and honestly, very disturbing. He was told that in the past, several groups have been unable to donate blood, tissue or organs. This group includes gay men, anyone incarcerated for more than two days in the past year and anyone convicted of a felony drug offense, no matter when the conviction occured. Our hospital, Piedmont, had followed those rules until January when they started following new guidelines, allowing candidates to sign a release, thus opening the pool of donors by thousands. Emory, just a few miles down the road, did the same a few years ago and tripled their transplants. Piedmont, by easing the restrictions, has done more transplants in two months of 2015 than they did in all of 2014! Talk about amazing statics! So Trouper signed the release without giving it a second thought. The doctor explained that previously, testing of organs/blood took longer in potential donors from these groups so the CDC had restricted their donations. However, in the past few years, technology has gotten so good, they are able to test and have results in a matter of a few hours. Again, he signed without giving it a second thought.
My blog today isn't so much about the pool opening for us, and our chances of a heart increasing, although that is a wonderful thing, it's about the discrimination that families face when their loved one dies and wants to generously donate. They are already grieving their loss, and going through a horrific experience, but to add the nastiness of discrimination breaks my heart. If you, or your loved ones fall in the group that I mentioned, please go ahead with your donation and know that finally your donation will be accepted, and will save a life. Please visit http://www.gavelife.org/from-gay-men to learn about current efforts to abolish this discrimination. Also, visit http://donatelife.net/organ-donation to learn about signing up to be a donor, and remember to share your wishes with your loved ones. In the end, live life then give life. You can't and shouldn't take your organs with you, let your legacy live on after your gone!
